Mid week musings

I am still here. Just busy. We have our local elections tomorrow, and one of the classrooms at school is being used as a polling station, so Debs and I draped all the computer equipment very fetchingly in maroon fabric this afternoon. Not that there is a living soul who would not know what is under the fabric, of course. Still, that is not my problem. It is covered.

The weather has been great, and I have done all my work experience visits. Our Year 10s are out getting some working experience at the moment. They have 2 weeks off, and the ones I have visited are happy and enjoying it, but tell me some are not! That I can believe. Every child is visited and assessed by a member of staff in the second week, so it has been a case of revolving doors at school as we all fly off when we have a free lesson. (I teach age range 11-16 at the moment.)

This weekend is a long weekend for May Day, so I am really looking forward to more time to relax. Why is our life conducted at warp speed??? I have been reading one of John Ortberg's books, and he talks a great deal about hurry and busy-ness, and how detrimental they are. I understand completely. One of his suggestions is to (get this!) choose the LONGEST queue at the supermarket. And practice patience. Hmmmm. I get his point though! I need to find more time for solitude and peace. Alone-ness, as opposed to loneliness is something I really need.

The dark and light sides of my Fridays.

Fridays are my nemesis. I rose reluctantly in the morning, but all change by 3.10pm. Now I wonder why?????!

1. Mum to dentist early
2. Buy milk for staffroom.
3. Year 8s. I will say nothing.
4. Fix aging machines.
5. Break: lecture on scissor safety delivered by enraged me.
6. Fix aging machines.
7. Year 9s. I will say less than nothing.
8. Fix aging machines.
9. Year 10s. Give me strength.
10. Fix aging machines.
11. Break: supervise Year 11s on aging machines.
12. Discover MILK FINISHED. Restrain self from throwing self on floor.
13. Give up fixing aging machines.
14. Year 10s. I survived.
15. Lecture on the "importance" of doing each others hair during textile lessons.
16. Tidy department.
17. Do road runner impression heading to car. (Cartwheels optional.)

The weekend is here. YES!!!!! And I didn't have to cook, as we were out to dinner.

I hope you all have a lovely relaxing time.

Marking fun

Today I started marking exam papers for the very first time. Oh my sainted aunt. There has to be something that disconnects the brain from reality when confronted with an exam paper. If only they used common sense. And just THOUGHT!!! Sigh. The powers that be decided that I didn't know the kids well enough to say who should do higher tier and who should not, and altered my lists. I was right. They were wrong. In a very evident way. But I am really proud of them all, because they know a great deal more than I thought they did.

One question required an answer and a reason for the answer, and the wonderful (wrong) reason was "because my teacher told me it was done this way". Yes. Well. Hmmmmm. Not that I recall. Nice try, though!

End of the holidays

Tomorrow we go back to school. I could do with another few weeks holiday, but I am sure mothers out there are very happy their little cherubs will be back to school. I remember those days well. I have no idea how this term will pan out, as we have a new department head starting tomorrow and I will have to wait and see what is planned. I do know that we have exams and work experience and all the associated upheavals to look forward to, and course-work to start as well.

Last half-term holiday, I worked straight through, but this time, I have listened to advice, and to myself too, in the end, and have done no work. I needed the break, and it was good. I could have done without the virus or the (continuing) deafness. Tomorrow will tell if this was wise or not!

Today has been the most beautiful of days, and we went to church and then to the babes for lunch. It was wonderful to sit out in the garden, in the sun, and watch them play. A lovely way to end the holidays. They are growing up so quickly. I cannot believe the twins will be starting "proper" school in September. It seems just yesterday that they were born.

So here we go back into the fray. I am reminding myself every day of the thoughts I have every time I go and walk in my mountains. I need to remember balance, and to aim for that. So why do I already have a headache?

"Off" day with a vengeance

I may have to start another anonymous blog which no-one can track back to me. I can't talk much about school here. So all I will say is that I am mentally and physically exhausted, and that I came within 2 minutes of resigning today. This is a thankless and exhausting job, and the kids are...... well, I am not going there. Is it the right place for me to be right now? I don't know any more. Maybe after a good night's sleep I will see things more clearly. Right now is not a good time. Sometimes there is nothing left to give.

Who knows....one day I might even write all about it. But then, no-one would ever believe the things I could tell you.

So I have little exciting news for any of you. I work. I come home. I cook. I work more. I go to bed. And I get up in the morning and do the same thing all over again. Sigh. This is a real whine, isn't it. But, hey, I am allowed off days. This is one, I freely admit. Put up with it.

It has been absolutely freezing here, with winds from the Arctic and sleet, hail and snow showers. It is the wind which is the worst though. Switzerland has had so much snow, and it is not finished falling yet. So what happened to spring then? Winter woolies are the order of the day once again.

Right then, enough of the moping and moaning. I am going to do what any sane and sensible woman would do and go and make some coffee and find some chocolate, and my slippers. And turn up the heating, and grab the remote control and probably fall asleep in front of the TV in a middle-aged fashion. And make a list of all the positive things I can think of. Like being able to pay the bills. And buy the coffee and chocolate. And turn up the heating. And buy a TV license. And pay for broadband. See.... it is working.

Start of a new term

Back to school we go...... David started today and I had a training day. The best part of training days is that you get a cooked breakfast thrown in. That you have not had to cook yourself. I did mention that it takes very little to excite me, didn't I? One of the highlights of the day was that I actually spent 3/4 of an hour sharpening all the pencil crayons in my class pencil crayon box. I mean, really... not one pencil was usable, which would have meant wandering little angels all searching for illusive sharpeners, pausing to chat about their holiday to friends, which would have meant no-one listening to me, Which would have meant no-one doing any work, which would have meant me getting slightly irritated, which would not have been a "positive outcome". Good grief, I am beginning to speak in the school paperwork lingo. I am doomed. But I do have pointy pencil crayons.

So, my news from the weekend is that the prepared lesson plan count is now up to 28. I went to church and that was really good, but apart from that, it was me and lesson plans. I need a life.
Tomorrow I teach for the first period and then I am off to observe classes at another school. It is in a town nearby, but I have never been there before. I don't think it is huge, and I have no idea where the school is, but I am sure I will find it. I am a woman. I will stop and ask. Or I could just look on the internet, of course. Hold on a sec. Found it. I am a genius.

Saturdays should not be like this

10 hours of work
6 teaching schemes written
7 lesson plans sorted
Sore head
41 lesson plans to go
Back to school on Monday

(Well, to be honest, I don't have to have all 48 done this week, I just wanted to plan ahead as much as I could.)

And

2D design conquered
School paraphenalia bought

So what happened to my holiday?

Let it snow.....please!

It is going to snow. The excitement mounts. Tomorrow is the last day of school before half term holidays for David, so he is really hoping it snows. Everything stops then. We are on snow watch for our school too, and hopefully I could have a day at home in the warmth. Maybe! My sister shrieks with laughter at what one small snowfall does to the UK. Living in Switzerland, things are slightly different there. Snow is normal. Here it is so abnormal now that nothing works. I don't think there is a snow plough within a couple of hundred miles.

My friend, Glynis, is doing a head massaging course at the moment, and as she needed someone to practice on, I volunteered. Tonight she came round, and I was a very willing guinea pig. VERY willing. I cannot tell you how wonderful it was to have a head massage. And she will come once a week for the next 2 weeks as well, as part of her training. I can live with that. Oh yes, I can.

Don't you just love the massage you have at the hairdresser when you have your hair shampooed? I think that is the best part of going to the hairdresser. The head massage. I could fall asleep quite happily, totally relaxed. That reminds me, I really do need to do something about making an appointment in the very near future. Another urgent necessity. It is looking very tired indeed. The hair.

This is a totally inane post. School is good. Kids still coming in at lunch to sew. Did I mention that one little toad took one of my very expensive embroidery threads and wound it round the art block? Orange thread? That we needed and can't replace? I was less than thrilled, and they were quivering once I had read the riot act. And you have no idea how far a reel of thread can go and how annoyed teachers get when they trip over bunches of it, and get it caught in their shoes, and then drag it along as they walk, collecting sweet wrappers, leaves and chewing gum as the go. And WHO do they hold responsible? Yes. Clearly, there is only one textiles teacher in the school, and that would be me. Last week, one of them thought it would be great fun to wind a huge reel around the senior teachers' cars in the car park. That was definitely not a good idea. I will have to resort to body searches as they leave the classroom one of these days.

Freezing out

It is absolutely freezing outside at the moment. The car iced up in just 2 and a half hours. I have just come home from book club. Our 150th meeting. We are all celebrating by going out for a meal on Saturday, and that is when we will do our vote on the best books we have read in those 150 meetings. The short list is long. Well, about 30-40 books. But if you think that there are well over 1000 in "The Book", then that is doing well. You will get the top ten on Sunday and then the top 3. And of course, our winner too.

Teaching today was fun. I had a ball, and I think the kids did too. So now I have met everyone I am teaching, and we are beginning to understand each other. Like the fact that I call the shots. However, a senior teacher was laughing when he told me it might be wise to get one of the kids to tell me when we were 10 minutes from the end of the lesson, as we all got so involved that we were late finishing and clearing up. Yes, indeed. I have 17 coming in tomorrow at lunch to finish making their bags. I think that is quite a good sign, as they are all volunteers, or rather, they all begged. AND I collected the laptop after school. Unfortunately I was in a rush, and completely forgot to ask the tech man how to log in away from school. Sigh. I will have to go back and find out tomorrow. Absolutely useless piece of metal when I can't get into it at all.

It appears that my year 7s (about 11-12 years old) have never used the sewing machines before. I refer to the pedal as an accelerator with my little boys. A stroke of genius, I feel. They tend to like sewing once they are called "boy racers". Unfortunately they did not get the concept of "steering" the material either. And here I was thinking they all knew what to do after 6 weeks. Do you know what happens when all the machines seize up in 2 minutes all at the same time? Chaos. Shrieks of outrage. They didn't know that the foot had to be lowered. I did my road runner impression as I zapped between the machines, hair falling down, hacking the tangled thread out of the bobbin casings, and one little cherub said..." Miss, you never stop moving". I think I am going to wear one of those pedometer things next term to see how many miles I do in a day. Or buy those shoes with wheels in them. Then collapse in a darkened room with a cold cloth over my eyes.

I wear anything with large pockets to work, so that the lethal things, like my scissors and roller cutters are never out for them to play with, and I see today that I now have a 2 inch slit in said pocket, so the scissors now dangle out of the bottom, attempting to carry out minor or major surgery on my legs as I walk. This is a trifle inconvenient, as the pockets also house my board markers, pens, pencils, extra bobbins, needles, thread and a zillion other essential items, which are now scattered through the school. Sigh. A fashion plate I am not.

Sleepy weekend, or why I have nothing worthy of note to relate....

I have had a number of comments this weekend about the lack of updates. Good grief. I must be the equivalent of the local newspaper. I would love, at this stage, to report that I have had a wild and wonderful weekend, but it was so quiet, watching grass grow would have been more exciting.

I think I have underestimated in a big way just how much I have drained my physical and emotional reserves in the past year. If I sit down for longer than a few minutes, I fall asleep, and that is what I have done most of the weekend, apart from venturing out briefly to get bread yesterday, and going to church and our monthly shared lunch today. Snoozing? I have got it down to a fine art. David actually woke me at 6.30 this evening asking plaintively if we were going to have any dinner today. Um, yes. Food. We do need food. I thought about it for a few minutes and was just drifting off again when my mother phoned and jolted me out of my nap. And this is the woman who never needs to sleep much. I am up late and awake early. I have never "napped" in my life, and have no desire to do so now. Just the body thinks otherwise. Sigh. And we have had beautiful weather too. Wasted on me, it was.

BUT

I can report that my house is a cobweb free zone at last. And I have finally managed to get the box with the Christmas tree out of my kitchen and back into the shed in the garden. We now have clean clothes and my hair is under control. Rivetting stuff, isn't it.

School was tough. Not easy to deal with the anger of the kids, who had no idea that their old teacher was leaving. No-one told them. That took the first part of every lesson to sort. Once we got going, it went well. I think. However, in one class, a group of girls refused to take any part in the lesson, so I ignored them, and got on with the others. A couple joined in when they saw what we were doing, but some did nothing. There is absolutely nothing anyone can do to make them listen if they won't. But that was just a small group. The rest of the classes were hectic. I seemed to be in perpetual motion. The kids were involved anyway, and busy. I have no idea how anyone would or could judge what it was like, but I think about 7/10 would be fair. It was not an unmitigated disaster. There were a few moments when I had serious doubts, but we got through that. And tomorrow is another day. I was talking to some of my teaching friends today at the shared lunch, and they think enthusiasm will go a long way. One offered me a job at an "easy"school! The teacher who left, by the way, is going back to America. She said she had never seen kids like this in all her teaching experience. The school I work at has an extraordinary number of special needs kids. I did say I like a challenge, didn't I? If I survive this, I can survive anything.

My laptop? Well, that is another story. Suffice to say that I have not got it yet. My excitement might have been a little premature. I live in hope. You know, teaching something like textile technology is not the same as teaching, say, Maths. In an academic class, the teacher stands in the front and teaches. In Textiles, I am controlling up to 25 kids moving about, working on 7 sewing machines, 4 computers, 2 embroidery machines, ironing, cutting out, printing designs on the sublimation printer, learning how to use pinking shears etc. All at the same time. I have to be everywhere all the time, especially when they can't re-thread the machines, or break a needle, or need help on the computer. The room rings to the sound of 20 odd voices yelling "MISS" "MISS" "MISS" all the time. (All teachers seem to be called Miss, by the way. Men are Sir. This is possibly because none of them ever remember a name, of course.) Anyone walking in would see chaos, but it is not really. Everyone knows what they are doing. Ah well, it will get easier. I hope. I still think that this is where I am supposed to be, and what I am supposed to be doing.

I did intend to write about something completely different, but my fingers ran away with themselves. And my brain is too tired to protest. So...... this will have to be the missive for today. I will be back tomorrow.

Another day at the coalface

Schools. Kids. Parents. Teachers. Where did we all get so complacent? When did kids start thinking it was fine to misbehave and when did their education become something they dismiss without a thought? How have we reached a stage where they have no aspirations? Who is to blame? Is it because we have a benefits system that means that they think that they will never have to work? Or is it more because they all seem to know their "rights", and teachers are powerless? How many excuses do we make for their behaviour? And how many labels do we have to stick on them? They all seem to think they will be millionaires and be able to buy (there we are on the acquisition trail again) anything their little hearts desire. It is their right. To have everything they want. And with little or no effort.

Our united nations of teachers at our school are all of the same mind when we discuss the complete lack of respect or appreciation of the wonderful gift that a good education can be. Those who come from the Bahamas or Africa, or the Eastern block countries can speak of children who just dream of getting an education. Who walk for miles to school with no shoes. How children sit down and obey instructions and work hard to make something of their lives. They don't have any safety net there. If you don't work, you don't eat. Education is prized above just about anything. So how did one of the most advanced of the 1st world countries end up with children who think they call the shots roaming the corridors of schools? And what does this mean for the future of the nation? Or the world, come to that.

I am constantly amazed by the determination and dedication of the core of excellent teachers, who never give up trying, or hoping. Other teachers come and go, just marking time until they can move to "good" schools, where teaching is not a daily ordeal. And the kids? I keep believing that if I can make a difference to even one child, it will have been worth it. Not easy at times.

The scary thing is that they speak to everyone like this. Their parents. Their teachers. Authority figures. Anyone. And there is almost nothing we can do to stop it. Then there are the good kids in every class, who try so hard to get on with things, in the middle of open anarchy at times. They deserve so much more. Homework? Why bother? Bring equipment? What is that?

Sometimes it is more crowd control than teaching. There is a whole world out there that had never been part of my experience of life. Parents who back their children and not the teachers. Parents who seem to encourage their children to misbehave or to push limits. Parents who spend fortunes on things like ipods and the latest game equipment, but who don't provide pencils and pens. Parents who just never do anything to control their kids, and kids who do not know the meaning of choices and consequences. Children who simply cannot see where they are heading. And children who simply do not care.

There are many kids at this school who are special needs kids. That means they may have social, physical, mental, behavioural or learning disabilities. For any number of reasons. What they need is consistency, security and stability. I sound like a crusader. I suppose in a way I am one. I probably always will be. But it is hard at times. And so incredibly sad too.