Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Are we real?

After reading MG's post this morning I thought a long while about how real I am in this blogging world. Is this really me? In a sense, it would be quite possible to be whoever we chose to be, I suppose, but that thought never occurred to me at all. I don't see the point of pretending to be something or someone I am clearly not. People who know me in "real" life say I write here just as I speak.It sounds like me. This is good.

Like so many of you, I started blogging when my daughter did. I wanted to be part of this new world, and speak to her specifically, and then I started looking for people my own age and found a world of women I am coming to know well, whose lives I share in print and cyberspace, and who are real to me, at least. I trust my instincts here.

Because we are usually alone when we write, I think we tend to speak about things that we may not verbalise easily in company at times. I write for myself, not to try to impress anyone. There is no-one to impress here late at night. I am talking about what I do and think and feel. Well, some of it. One of my old friends has been known to say that 99% of me is kept hidden from the general public. I don't think it is quite that high a percentage, but yes, I have a part of me I tend not to share easily. With anyone. Those who know me a little better can read between the lines now and then and sense the things I choose not to say, and there are one or 2 who I have emailed privately to fill in some of the blanks. I do edit out some of the tough stuff, and I may never share that, or I may wait a few months to say anything, when it is no longer raw. This is not my life story. It is simply a reflection of who I am today and of my rollercoaster ride through life in my middle years. No. My prime. Of course.

I am just an ordinary woman. With 52 years of experience of life. There have been successes and failures. Triumphs and tragedies. Laughter and tears. Wars and peace. Good decisions and catastrophic ones. Choices and consequences learnt the hard way. Nothing spectacular. I do not lead a charmed life. I have mountains of challenges to face. However, I have been blessed with a healthy dose of optimism, and a "can do" rather than a "can't do" philosophy of life.

You know, one of the greatest things about all of this is that age plays no part in the blogging world. Some of you could be my daughters. And I read about your trials with your babes, and it triggers memories buried in time of my own babes, that perhaps I would have forgotten. It is such fun to read that some things never change, and I love it all. I just want to yell loudly now and then to tell you all to savour every moment. It is gone so quickly. They grow up overnight. I love the fact that I can join in the celebrations when babies are born, when journeys are completed, when prayers are answered. I love the fact that we can share and support each other through laughter and tears. And tears of laughter.

I like to think you would recognise me in real life.

2 comments:

Morning Glory said...

This is so well written and expressed. I have no doubt that you are real through and through. I do hope we get to meet someday.

Heidi said...

I agree with mg this is - if I can trust my instincts - very real! It is wonderful that this has become a community of people supporting one another and thanks of course for yours!!