Thursday, January 25, 2007

Half asleep

You know you are getting old when you fall asleep in the rocking chair for the second night in a row. Around 8.30pm. Still wearing the jacket you came home from work in, and still with boots on. Sigh. All of a sudden 29 seems a long time ago. Who am I kidding.... it WAS a long time ago. Maybe it is because I work with people my kids' ages. My sentance construction seems a bit discombobulated tonight too. You know what? Too bad. I am not being graded here.

It has been crisp and very cold today. And there is actually snow in Switzerland, you will be relieved to hear, especially if you are contemplating a ski trip in half-term, which is just 2 weeks away. I am not contemplating anything. I wish I was. I am tired, but I have already mentioned this ad nauseum. All I seem to have the energy for is work at the moment. This is not how I want to be. I suppose it does take a great deal of adjustment, and while I love what I do, I do not want it to consume me. I need to still be me, and have time for my friends and family. So many new things to adjust to. New job. New people. New church. New is good. I just don't want to lose the old. There we are, back to the old word again. Groan.

I phoned the Coroner a couple of days ago to see if by any remote chance he had an idea of when the inquest was likely to be. My optimism knows no bounds. No. He is still waiting for 2 or 3 more doctors' reports, and only after all the papers are in will he put it on the list. I asked, with considerable restraint, if it was likely to be this year. "I hope so" he replied. It is January. I am not holding my breath. And am I the only one wondering how reports written over 6 months after the event can be in any way accurate? The inquest will be interesting. I have the right to ask questions. Oh yes, I will be asking questions.

On a lighter note, Roger Federer played the match of his life today in the Australian Open.... I wish I could have watched it. I do like Roger. And tennis. The weekend is nearly here. February will soon arrive, and then spring won't be far away. Now that is a good thought.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Good morning, Linds,

You know, since you and I only recently met, I only had a vague idea of what you've gone through recently. I knew you'd lost your husband but I didn't know why. When I saw "inquest" I went back through your archives to find out why.

It's very hard to believe it takes more than six months for an inquest to be done. I can't begin to imagine how frustrated you are.

I'd be tired, too. But one thing I saw all throughout your posts since Geoff died is unfailing optimism and courage. You are amazing. I've heard this exact thing about you from other bloggers out here.

I admire your strength and I really hope you get some answers soon.