Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Sleepless in Middle England....

Without sleep, I am not a ray of sunshine. I have not slept, so draw your own conclusions re the mood this morning. I have been sitting here since dark o' clock reading, and wriggling about trying to get comfortable. Why, you may ask??? That man is a SADIST. The physio man. We need to strengthen the rest of your leg, he says. Oh joy. So he sticks his thumb into the base of my ligament which is either fully or partially ruptured, and I mention that it hurts a bit. I am the mistress of understatement. Don't worry, he says, increasing the pressure, it will go numb soon. He neglected to tell me that when the numbness wears off it will feel like the hounds of hell are gnawing on said knee. All night. This morning. And probably for eternity at this rate.

I said I was not a ray of sunshine.

I told him that my blood is confused. I have ice packs on the knee which the blood passes through, and then it gets to my foot, and it has a heat pack on, so it warms up, and then zooms up to the knee again, and freezes. It is a wonder I have not had a blood induced heart attack. I told him my foot is way colder than the other one. Hmmm, he says. I can feel it. The circulation is restricted by the swelling in the knee. Hello? Circulation? It should circulate. The blood. MY blood. Freely. I do not need my foot to drop off.

No sleep, remember.

Anyway, I have more hot coffee and some toast. Maybe I will feel a little more human and pleasant in a sec.

My favourite place.
On the surface, this is an easy one to answer. The little village in the Alps in Switzerland. It is a combination though, of the place, the scenery, and the fact that my sister lives there. Not to mention that I fell in love with Switzerland when I was 12 and that has never changed.

I love the mountains. But I also love the sea. I love walking in the forests on the mountains in Switzerland. I love the feeling of safety I have there. The beauty is self-evident, and the peace and silence is food for my soul. I love being there. I love walking with my son. I love walking alone. (Walking. Groan. That won't happen with this *^*&%^%$! knee this year.) I just love being there.

But maybe I love it in a special way now, because my family is there. Because I have been so many times to stay with my sister that I know it so well. But because she told me what to look for and where to go. And then I discovered the rest for myself. It is a place I always long to return to. My favourite place on earth.

Or is it?
I love New Zealand too. It is an amazingly beautiful place and I have just scratched the surface of it really. There is so much more to see. And so much sea to sit and watch too. One of my best things. But the most important thing is that it is where my daughter lives. My ONLY daughter. So does the fact that it is home to someone special in my family colour my view of it? Probably. It is more special because when I go there, I am spending time with someone I love. And being so happy to arrive somewhere because you are spending time with people you love makes the actual place very special too, by association.

This village has been home to me and my family for 18 years now. This week, in fact. I think. Diana??? You are the one who remembers these things! Is it special in and of itself? Maybe not. There are no mountains. And we could not live further from the sea if we tried. It is an ordinary English village. But the fact that it is home makes it special. Not for the place, but for the people associated with it. My family. My friends. And while my home is here, it is a favourite place too. But if I were to move my home, then that would change.

I have been to many places. I have seen many things. I love Scotland. I love Cornwall. I love France. I love Cape Town. I loved Austria when I was a child. There are many more places I would love to visit too. One day.

I like to think, though, that wherever I make my home, it will be my family's favourite place. It is the people who matter. Maybe, without my family in Switzerland, and the love and warmth I always find there, it would just be another place I love, and not my favourite place. Ditto for New Zealand.

Wherever they are, my sons and daughter, sister and mother - those are my favourite places on earth. The eyes can absorb the beauty of so many stunning places, but only the heart can absorb the love, and that, to me, is what makes my favourite places so special.

9 comments:

Unknown said...

You are a pretty deep thinker for staying up all night and entertaining the hounds from hell.
It does get confusing to try and figure out why you love a certain place. Until those that you love are removed from the location you really will never know if it is those that you love or the location itself that holds your heart.

Well I am off to the shower.... Doctor appointment today and I need to write down changes to my medications per other two Doctors instructions.

Have a wonderful day.

Vee said...

Yup, I agree with Jo...deep thoughts these. Do I sense change a'brewin' here, too? "Home is where the heart is" and your heart sounds as restless as your spirit. Not to worry, though, a stirring is necessary just before the next good thing.

Your knee has just gone to the top of my prayer list. It sounds so painful.

secondofwett said...

I just found your blog from a comment that you made on another blog.....I enjoy your writing...I will come back and visit again....it's nice to read.

Crystal said...

It sounds like the thoughts of your favourite place have taken your mind off the pain, for a bit at least :)) I agree that it's the people that make a place special. The place means one thing but it's only a small part. I have hardly moved at all in my lifetime (my family home is just 32 km away!) and yet it means very little without the people. Now just wait until you have grandchildren! That gives a whole new meaning to a place.

I pray that the leg gets stronger - but the pain gets less - very soon!

Needled Mom said...

It is wonderful to have thoughts like that to drift off to in place of suffering through all of the pain.

I tend to agree that your system must be in an ice/heat shock. What dreadful treatment.

Dawn said...

I am shuddering, just thinking of your pain - good thing you have a high tolerance - or has that gone away??

So many things to comment about - I've been gone and am now sadly behind! The wedding - gorgeous. Your fashion commentary - hilarious! The high, pointed shoes - painful to watch! The strapless gowns - I'm kinda tired of them. But they're definitely "in."

Sorry you're not sleeping - are you taking pain pills? At least Tylenol PM??

Your favorite places - lovely writing and lovely thoughts.

I need to check out some of your other readers, but have a hard time getting around to my regulars. I can't fathom have 1500+ commenters!

I hope you feel better soon!!

We'll be watching my niece's wedding at 6 a.m. Saturday - the wedding is at 1 p.m. over there, and they're somehow getting it to us - at least we hope so! She's being married at the Great Warford Baptist Chapel and the reception is at The STag's Head Hotel. Do you know where those places are?

zztop357 said...

Home is where the heart is Linds.
Still true today as it was when first said.
I'm sorry you're not sleeping.It makes for a long and weary day. I be glad when the Dr's get everything back in working order again. It's a shame we can't get new parts and over-hauls like they do to vehicles.
Wouldn't that be nice?
God bless, and try to sleep. Donna

Susie said...

Hi Linds,
That physical therapy sounds like pure torture. I hope by the time you read this that the pain has eased and you've been able to get some sleep.
I loved you favorite places thoughts, but most of all "wherever they are, my sons and daughter, sister and mother-those are my favourite places on earth"
So very true!
xo

Prixie said...

thank you for visit and your words of wisdom..it really helps when someone can empathise.

as for home, i realised its more people than a place.