Friday, January 28, 2011

Being ordinary......

Yesterday, My new(ish) blogging friend from Switzerland, Helen, wrote the most beautiful post. You can go here to read it. An ordinary life.

I could have written almost exactly the same words. In fact, some I have already written, I suspect. It made me pause when I read it, and whisper to myself - yes - me too. I feel just as she feels about being ordinary.

And one day, if that is all that is remembered of me outside my family, then so be it. You see, I know. I know that my life is right for me. For my family. And I too am not hankering after castles in my dreams. Any longer. Of course I had grandiose dreams when I was young. When I was a child, those dreams knew no limits, and that is the way childhood should be. The world was waiting, after all.....

Then I grew up along the way.

And so the dreams changed. My life changed with each decision I made. My choices led to other choices, and those in turn led me to where I am now and who I am today.

I am an ordinary woman. I am a mother and a friend. A daughter and a sister. Once, I was a wife, although it is 1665 days since Geoff died. (I can't believe so many days have passed.)

1665. how can that be possible?


I love my children, and I love my daughter-in-law and my granddaughter. I love my Mum and my sister, and my brother-in-law. They are all the centre of my world. I put being a Mum up there as my greatest achievement. I have not done a lot of things, but I have been a mother who stayed at home (for the most part) and delighted in raising my kids, and would not change that for a nanosecond.

I love my home, and being able to create a space people are welcomed and happy to visit. I love having a myriad of hobbies and interests and I am so glad I turned away from the dreams of corporate success and chose instead to stay at home.

I love sewing and crocheting, and trying new things. I love woodwork and flowers and gardening and growing my own vegetables. I love going for walks, especially in the mountains. I love my church and I love my friends. My world is very colourful.

There are no headlines here, you see. Just an ordinary woman who loves blogging. Who has words tripping over each other as she tries to write what she feels in her heart. Of her ordinary life.

But never confuse "ordinary" with "boring". Oh no. Comfortable. Normal. Unspectacular. All words Helen used. It does not take much to keep me happy, you see. (Note I said "keep" - not "make"!) Even though my children - my family - are scattered about the world, I still have skype and phones and messenger and facebook. One day, plane tickets may be added to the list too, of course!

I am 56, and I can page through the piles of photos taken over 56 years and trigger so much laughter and so many memories. You have NO IDEA how many photos you can amass over 56 years. Thank heavens that this century, all my photos are on the computer (and a few external whatsits too, of course.) I have video/DVDs of my babies when they were so small.

Recently, I happened to open the cupboards containing the stash of fabric, and I saw a pillow case of Maya the Bee fabric I had kept from when my children were little, and instantly, I heard the theme tune, being sung by little kids in my mind. My little kids.

Would I trade? No. Not a chance.

So I will go back to my blanket stitching, delighting in the fact that I know how to do it, and carry on creating something beautiful. The crockpot is bubbling with a sausage creation in it. Jean is coming to supper. The recession heater is on my lap.

All the paths and detours and roundabouts of my life have lead me here. To this place right now, and I too am content. Unremarkable. Ordinary. I am so very lucky to be here, and to have been able to be at home.

I love being me right now.


(ignoring all the challenges and stuff we all have going on in our lives, because that is what happens anyway, it is called life...)

I am content.


Needled Mom said...

Both yours and Helen's post reflect such contentment. There is such peace within when one reflects on their life and is so comfortable being ordinary. I would make bets that many others wish they could be ordinary too.

Helen in Switzerland said...

Wow Linds - I just read this - thank you so much for mentioning me - but I don't think I rate on the eloquence stakes in comparison! I know that you have been through difficult times, as have I in the past - maybe that's what makes us content with what we have now. I think we're both very lucky to have that contentment - but then I also think life is what you make it! Have a lovely weekend - and if my blog stats go through the roof I'll know why!

Becky said...

What a great reminder that this is what it's all about -- being content and living life as it's given to us. I just love reading the things you write.

Mary said...

If being ordinary means being content and happy with the life you have, then ordinary is the goal we should strive for. I think you must be a very successful "ordinary" woman...Great post today...

kevin blumer said...

im 29 all my firends are older than me i have allways found with older people they have such a better understanding of the world and they so outgoing i cant belive my best friend pat her hubby died about a year ago shes so active but yet she still has a lot of time to go threw my problems an how i am and that i dont myself live an ordanery life i have very little trust for people and was brougt up in a family that dint have morals so i am a big fan of older people and im glad your writing your blog

The Bookworm said...

I enjoyed both your post and Helen's. Being content with the ordinary is a blessing (fortunately one I share!). I was reminded of a conversation I had recently with a delightful young mum in her mid-twenties while we were supervising a room full of four year old ballerinas. We were discussing Angel's school (which she had attended) and griping about its determination to channel the brighter girls into academic A levels and university courses, regardless of whether their inclinations are domestic or vocational. She had known from very early on that all she wanted out of life was to be a mother and was obviously very content with her young family. Such a shame that simple domestic contentment is not seen as a suitable aspiration for teenage girls.

Midlife Mom said...

I too find myself as ordinary or mediocre as I call myself some days but I am so content in my lot in life. Is it perfect, no, do I have my struggles, yes, but all in all I have a contentment that many would give their right arm for and for that I am blessed. Great post as always!!!

Donnetta said...

Oh Linds I can't tell you how much my heart needed to be reminded of this perspective today! God has been working overtime in my heart recently along these same lines.

Thanks for this renewed perspective to begin my week.