Today is my youngest child's 23rd birthday. HOW DID THAT HAPPEN????? Where have the years gone? And why did time speed up so fast? How?
|David and Jean in Switzerland this winter|
The questions every mother asks at one stage (or 99) of her life. I see the tiny little scrap he was when he was born, and then my mind flashes to the giant man he is now. I see the little boy with long red curly hair proudly showing off his new Nike trainers - he was 2 and they were the only shoes I could find with a sufficiently high arch support in them - my kids all battled with flat feet. And then I see the teenager trying to take his father's place when his mother sort of fell apart (on very rare occasions). And where is the little choir boy with the beautiful voice in choir robes? The child who chose to go to a school where he knew no-one because he recognised that "they like each other here - they don't push and shove"?
The man he is now is awesome, to use modern parlance. He is thoughtful - he helps everyone. He entertains us, he even cooks! His general knowledge is astounding, and his strength even more amazing. He sees needs and steps in. He is generous to a fault and gentle. A great combination.
I love him to bits. We all do. He is human of course. And his room is always a disaster zone, but one day he will remember that his mother taught him to be tidy. He has dreams, and he is going after them, and I will cheer him on every step he takes. The woman he one day marries will be a lucky lady, because he instinctively recognises things. And he is a born father.
|Uncle David watching over Missy|
I can't wait to see where he goes and what he does with his life.
That is the hardest part of being a Mum, you know. The letting go, waving cheerfully. Giving them the confidence and skills to move into the world and create their own sphere which may or may not be close by. And holding on to the fact that you will always be their mother, even when "home" means something different to them. There isn't a day when I do not think about all three of my children constantly. They are part of me. I made them. They are mine. And I have to let go for them to become who they are meant to be.
|I feel a Titanic moment coming on.....|
But I love them. Deeply. So much that I would still leap in front of them if a bus were to come barrelling towards them. That kind of love. Lay down my life for them. It is Easter time, isn't it, and I can't help but think about Someone else who willingly laid down His life for us all. Me. You. That kind of love. I understand it, because in my own tiny insignificant speck of the universe, I would do it too.
Being a mother is not for wimps.
But I have survived so far.
I want to talk about other things like the proposed snooper bill here in the UK (Crystal, it is of huge concern to me) and make-up. Yes, you heard me correctly - make-up. But that can wait for later.
Happy Birthday, David!