Does this sound weird? I have this image in my mind, which will not go away, of me, standing on the top of a mountain, with my arms spread wide. I can see me from behind only. Reaching out? Embracing the world? I wake with the image and it flashes through my mind at different times of the day, and no, absolutely not, I am not going to burst into "The hills are alive" and go gambolling off through the meadows. I have not been watching old movies. I don't even know if there are meadows up there on the mountain I keep seeing. Or where it is.
I just see me up there. Now if I could just have the large flashing arrow pointing to the neon instruction board, that would help.
I spent some time today pondering this image. And I was trying to rationalise it, by saying - yes, we all know how much I love mountains, specifically the Alps, and walking on them. Preferably down them. In forests. Maybe this is why I have the image which doesn't go away. I want to be there. Now would be good. Maybe? Wishful thinking?
And then I thought of how I am multi-faceted, like all of us. I also love going to the beach before dawn, and sitting on a rock, or the sands, watching the first rays of the sun rise over the water. I love the silence of the mountains, or the faint sound of leaves rustling in the forests I walk through, but I also love the sounds of the waves breaking on the shore, the sounds of the seagulls overhead. Mountains, sea, silence, noise.
I love the changing light, the casting out of shadows. I love the movement of the clouds against a bright blue sky. I love watching birds I cannot identify soaring high above me.
But why am I standing there with outstretched arms on that mountain? And why doesn't the image go away? Or change?
I have said this before - I have a feeling that I have been planted here on my backside, which is considerable right now, until I "get" what I am supposed to be doing next. I have a suspicion that I am missing all the signs. Or refusing to recognise them. I knew the day I went for the interview at the school ages ago, that it was wrong, and because "I knew better", of course, I took the job. I should have trusted more. So I had to be stopped in my tracks. The first attempt didn't work, when I ripped my chest muscles. So we now have a more defined stop. As in I cannot walk.
And now I have this image. Is there anyone out there with any ideas? Because it is not going away.......